The up side of being: Down to One

For those of you where were at DAR Constitution Hall last night, I know you'll agree with me that Melissa Etheridge was abso-freaking-lutely AMAZING in concert.

I bought our tickets a month ago and surprised Apes with them - earning major brownie points that I intend on collecting in the form of an "okay to be a slob for the day" pass.

There's not a bad seat in this venue - and Apes and I should know - ours were located in the VERY top row, at the opposite end of the stage. That being said, we managed to worm our way closer to the action.

We couldn't let Heidi and Teri, who were sitting like princesses in a box seat, show us up completely.

Happy with our newly acquired seats, we settled in for what turned out to be THREE full hours of magical Melissa goodness.

Three hours. No break.

No over the top stage presentation.

No videos.

Just Melissa, her guitar, her band, and her inspirational take on life and how she's choosing to live it.

While I love her new music too, I have to say the lyrics of her older tunes are powerful and comforting for anyone who's ever found themselves in the deep, dark, world of a break-up.

The moment she started playing the first few notes of her song "Down to One," I found myself immediately transported back to my condo in Charlotte, NC.

Five or six years ago.

I was sitting cross-legged on the hardwood floor in the dining room, the batteries of my phone scattered across the room, the result of throwing my phone after hearing Her hang up on our relationship.

She was my first love. I'd given every bit of everything I had.

I wanted it to work so much that even my teeth hurt when she told me she didn't love me and never had.

I remember throwing the phone and then searching through my CDs, blinded by tears, fumbling around until I found Melissa's SKIN album. I skipped songs until I heard "Down to One." I cranked it up as loud as I thought I could get away with and then sank into that cross-legged position on my dining room floor.

To this day, I remember singing the lyrics to that song, wiping away a flood of tears and staring so intently at the grasscloth wallpaper I'd painted brick red that I felt like I'd entered the chamber of my broken heart.

Those lyrics conveyed every single emotion I was feeling.

What went right
What went wrong
Doesn't really matter much
When it's gone

Was it too hard to try
Was it too hard to lie
Did you just grow tired of hello and goodbye
Was it the naked truth that made you run
Where do I go now
That I'm down to one

Sooner or later
We all end up walking alone
I'm down to one
My heart is a traitor
It led me down this road
Now it's done
I'm down to one

I want to know where I failed
I want to know where I sinned
Cause I don't want to ever feel this way again
Was the wanting too deep
Did it block your sun
Where do I go now
That I'm down to one

What am I supposed to think
What am I gonna say
What did I ever know
About this love anyway


I must have kept my neighbors up for weeks with that song.

Finding the person I lost in that relationship (I considered it one, even if she didn't), took me a very long time.

I repeat, a very long time.

But I'm grateful for having had those painful experiences because without them, I would not know to cherish what I have with April every single day.

To be in a relationship with someone who is truly a partner in every sense of the word is a phenomenal feeling. Someone who doesn't play games or feel the need to establish control. A person not afraid to love and be loved.

I get just how important that is.

And as I sat in my seat last night, listening to Melissa sing "Down to One," I held April's hand a little bit tighter and marveled at how far I've come since losing myself on that floor in North Carolina.

Apes and I found ourselves shaking our heads in agreement as Melissa explained her philosophy on life. Truth is what you'll get if truth is what you seek. We all have choices and we're all in control - if we choose to take it.





April's first attempt at taking our photo:


And her second (how she escaped this pic without a serious neck injury, I have no clue):


Nope. No good here either. Contrary to how it appears, I had not helped myself to an entire bottle of whiskey:


You know the phrase, if you want something done right...do it yourself? I concur. :)


Thankfully what we share is beautiful, even if all of our pictures aren't.

I love you, Apes.

PS: Kim, it was so great to run into you last night. Thank you for stopping April and I. It was truly a highlight of the evening for us!