Sunday, November 30, 2008

In awe. Of my kitchen.

I'm not lying when I say I've spent hours standing in the middle of my newly remodeled kitchen, spinning in circles, repeating the phrase, "Holy shit. This is REALLY my kitchen!"

I have such love for our remodeled kitchen that I'm thinking about cooking more than Lucky Charms for dinner.

Multiply that love by a million and you'll have the gratitude and love I feel toward my parents. They are machines. Six days of nonstop labor, ripping up the old and installing the new. My father is an engineer and unfortunately for him, can make any and all of my mother's decorative ideas a reality.

Here's what I've learned over the past six days:

When me, my mom or Apes hollered "Oh shit!," it was okay. My dad could fix it. When HE yelled "Oh shit!," he could fix it, but there was going to be a LOT more cursing.

Sometimes, when you measure appliances, the numbers aren't enough. You should slide the stove in between the cabinets before you molly bolt them to the wall. It'll save you a LOT of time. Trust me.

My mom gets nutty when exhaustion sets in. The woman took pictures of my butt crack.

My parents should host of their own remodeling reality show. They are hysterical and damn good at transforming spaces.

Check it out:

Here's what our OLD kitchen looked like (we were in the middle of clearing out the kitchen for the remodel. It wasn't normally this out of sorts. Normally...):

From the entry:
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Looking to the right:
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To the left:
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Our front room held all our Whirlpool appliances and cabinets - for nearly a month:
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It took all Apes had to deal with our living room looking like this during the remodel:

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My mother, the speed painter:

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Our friend Graham helped us to meet our seven day deadline. He did everything from electrical work, to insulation, to laying tile.

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He also doled out huge servings of puppy love. That's our dog Jean Paul on the left and my parent's dog, Hildy, on the right:

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The first cabinets hung (my dad installed under-mount lights in each of the hanging cabinets. Makes a HUGE difference!):

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My mom, grouting our floors. I got her an icy-hot patch for her back. I didn't even expect anything in return...

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My dad and April, shimming our cabinets so they were level:

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Apes and her power tools (my parents gave her that saw. You'da thought it was a brand new car...):

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I did a LITTLE work...

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Apes was super excited to get to use her grandfather's jigsaw:

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Stewart folded himself up and laid in the cat's bed...anything to get away from the racket in the kitchen:

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Safety first...

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He's exacting about everything. April would love to quit her job and follow him around for a year. She was totally his apprentice last week.

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Big moment - the faucet gets put together!

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The granite counter top (tile) is down, the back splash up and ready for grout:

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Starting to come together:

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The microwave goes up:

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My mom pointing out a gap that needs to be fixed:

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My mom noticing that I'm taking pictures for my blog:

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A full page of math was necessary to figure out where to mount our cabinet handles. I'm not kidding:

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And now, for the big reveal....

Here's what our kitchen looks like from the front entrance:

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Looking to the right:

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And to the left:

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I KNOW! I KNOW! HOLY SHIT!

My parents rock. There is NO way we'd have been able to afford this same kitchen if we'd had to pay for labor my parents graciously gave us.

Somehow, in between all the kitchen madness, my mother helped maximize our living space and cleaned the house while my father tended to other projects like: fixing the front door, installing a can light in our stairwell, installing base boards in our living room and moving the treadmill.

The rooms that were a wreck a week ago, now look like this:

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Mom and Dad,

Thank you for taking vacation so you could drive 13 hours and work your fingers to the bone for a solid week. April and I love and appreciate you more than we could ever articulate. We owe you. Again.

Monday, November 24, 2008

I'm baaaaaaack!

Home sweet home!

I had a blast in Texas with my pals and during Whirlpool Building Blocks. Now I'm home and renovating my kitchen with Apes, mom and pop.

Blogs and pictures on ALL of it as soon as I can.

I've missed ya!

Monday, November 17, 2008

Knee Caps n' Silverware.

Lord, there is so much happening here at the site of Whirlpool Building Blocks, I don't even know where to begin.

Some 250 volunteers arrived in Dallas on Sunday and today, they start building nine Habitat houses in just FIVE days. I'll be stalking them, taking their pictures and begging for interviews as I capture the details for the daily newsletter.

I'm hoping to post photos and stories here as well - if time allows. Currently, it's 1am and my happy butt will be on a bus to the build site at 6am. I want to throw up, just thinking about how little sleep any of us will be getting this week

A few highlights from the weekend:

I slipped while stepping out of the shower to get my razor. My career as an inner-knee model is over. Unless some medical facility is looking for a fat, black and blue knee. Then I'm totally the model they're looking for.

I was late for lunch today and when I entered the hotel conference room, I found the remaining food, but no silverware. I looked everywhere. I made a big production out of not being able to use utensils when Stefanie rolled her eyes and told me they were right under my nose, wrapped in a napkin. My response: "Um, you KNOW I won't recognize them if they're not wrapped in plastic! Why you gotta get all fancy on me?"

Yesterday I was starving, so I grabbed a little bag of cookies out of my room and headed back to the meeting room. The bag was closed tighter than Fort Knox and I had to use every muscle I owned to pop it. It rained 100 calorie cookies all up and down the carpeted hotel hallway. I was ravenous and they were cookies, so of course I picked them up and ate them. Judge me if you will, but I don't care.

More soon.

Signed,

BIK (busted inner knee)

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Fight the H8. Join the Impact.

It's been a little more than a week since the election and the painful realization that for whatever reason, people are still voting to write discrimenation into our Constitution.

Peaceful rallies have been happening with regularity and it's working. We aren't going to go away, just take it, or "deal" with it, as was suggested by someone in my comment section.

Join the Impact is organizing a nationwide PEACEFUL protest on Saturday, November 15th.

Please visit their website and find the rally closest to your city.

Stand up. Be heard. Be seen. Be present.

Be. equal.

Stranger Danger and other stuff.

I'm feeling all off kilter, not blogging every day.

It's not that there's nothing to blog about...I mean, yesterday, Christi took me to the Pilot gas station where she was stalked by a creepy man in a Christmas sweater. Even more frightening than his Christmas sweater was the fact he knew which store we'd just come from...he's lucky he backed off. I would have hated to wring Rudolph's neck...

Today I'm waiting for my aunt and uncle to pick me up so we can fetch my mother from the airport. We're going to spend a few days together before I report to work for Whirlpool Building Blocks.

Apparently, my uncle Randy has a "surprise" outing planned for Friday night. Not even my aunt has a clue. I admit to being a bit worried. It could involve anything from cow tipping, to gun play, to tobacco picking. I've had to reiterate several times that I'm game for whatever as long as there's no chance I could be arrested. It's imperative I show up to work on Saturday morning...

If I can work out all the kinks, starting Saturday I'll be blogging from my phone and reporting on the progress of the nine homes we'll be building in nine days. Most posts will likely be in bullet point form and submitted on the fly as I run from house to house. Watching the houses go up is always incredibly moving and I hope to be able to share that experience with you all.

In the event I'm incarcerated as a result of my Uncle Randy's party planning, you can keep up with the event HERE or by joining the Facebook page.

Monday, November 10, 2008

Photographic Evidence.

Here, and without effort to protect the guilty, are some photographs of my weekend in Texas...

I've always wanted to be picked up at the airport by someone holding a sign with my name on it. This isn't exactly what I had in mind, but I appreciated Brandy and Melissa made the effort...

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Mel and Brandy welcomed me to their casa in style. They had Diet Coke in the fridge AND mints on my pillow. I'm never leaving...

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Christi and Brandice were all googly eyes for each other. We had to remind them we were in the room.

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During dinner, Christi flung her fork at me...with a piece of steak still on it. It landed on the rim of my Diet Coke. She crossed the line when she tampered with my beverage...

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I retaliated by throwing waffle fries into her water. Two can play that game.

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Brandice feared a food fight and protected herself in the only way she could...

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I wish I woulda napkin-ed my face too. Christi managed to take the most horrible photos of everyone. All night long...

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Needless to stay, our waiter was glad to see us go. We stumbled (literally) out into traffic.

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I began to feel a little bullied when we returned to the house. Those are my shoes hanging from the light fixture in the kitchen...

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Saturday morning I fetched my shoes and we headed out to Melissa and Brandice's football practice. Yes, football practice. They are on the newly formed women's professional tackle football team: The Lonestar Mustangs.

These girls mean b'ness.

Melissa heading out to her defensive position. They scream "KILL!" every time they break from a huddle. This explains how she picked me up and twirled me like an airplane....

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Brandice getting ready to perform her receiver duties. Her goal: to get past Melissa. Melissa's goal: to kill Brandice. Good times, good times.

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Brandy, Christi and I couldn't let them have ALL the fun. We decided to show of our mad skills (we fully intended to turn the coaches down if they offered us starting positions on the team. It wouldn't be fair to rip them out of the hands of the current players...)

Christi's Manning-esque throw:
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I'm so hard core I won't even make an attempt to catch a poor throw...
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Brandy vying for Heisman trophy status:

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Later that day, after a movie and nap, we geared up to drop by a birthday party before hitting a club in Dallas.

This girl makes me laugh (unless she's making short jokes...). I can't help I'm only 5'2" and she didn't expect that...

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Brandy makes this hat look so good...

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I learned to protect my beverages from flying food...

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Christy kept walking up to empty chairs and saying: "Hi Chair"...get it? get it?

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Christi and Brandy sneak some hang time:

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I forgave Christi for the meat-in-my drink prank...but I haven't forgotten...

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Dorking it up with Melissa:

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We finally made it to Sue Ellen's and proceeded to act all kinds of crazy...

Brandice and Brandy gyrated all over the place (please note: Brandice is not really the hanky type. I shoved my beer napkin in her jacket pocket. Of course, Brandice is stylish enough to pull it off, so she left it):

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Air hockey got a lit' rough...

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Brandy and Melissa - these girls know how to host a guest!

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Molly met us at Sue Ellen's and while I had a great time with her, I still fault her for not protecting me from Brandy. I mean, she saw Brandy advancing on me after I dumped ice down her shirt...Molly totally could have helped save me from a beat down, but instead jumped out of the way...

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I crawled into bed about 3am and only then did I remember I'm too old for this shit.

My head hurt. My knees hurt. My hair smelled. My teeth grew a sweater.

If it weren't for the 2-liter of Diet Coke in the fridge, I'm not sure I woulda recovered....

Needless to say, I'm having a great time, but I admit to missing April so much it's made me sappy...